Sunday, December 27, 2015

Wtf is all I can say right now. I am not a fucking maid or the chick that just gets you off. If I didn't clean this house would be on hoarders. For the last week I had too much on my plate between Christmas, work, and the kids I'm lucky I had enough time to shit. Not one person did the dishes, laundry or dusted the entire week. Today I took the time to do the laundry and clean the bathroom. What did the husband and kids do while I was doing that...they went downstairs and played on the PlayStation (for hours). I'm so fucking sick and tired of doing everything around here. He lives like a fucking pig and I can't stand it.

If not every morning, every other morning I do what I can to satisfy my husband sexually. If we aren't having sex he's either getting a bj or a hand job. Did it this morning and in return (like usual) I got nothing. He rolled out of bed and made himself a fucking omelette and then asked if I wanted one (knowing that I don't like omelettes). Last night he was snuggling in bed and got hard. I rolled over and said, "someone's awake." His reply, "don't flatter yourself." You fucking prick. I'm sure he's cheating on me again (3rd times the charm). He gives nothing, just takes. Fuck this shit. 

Saturday, December 19, 2015

I got this

I've been on this journey to find myself for a few years. I needed someone in my life to balance me, trust me, let me find myself, let me fall and help me get back up. I have certainly found that in David. With the coming of the new year, I'm going to tell him that I love him but am not in love with him. From the first date, my heart belonged to him. David didn't stand a chance. He would never fully have my whole heart. When my head was on straight and we were good, I have never been happier. I'm going to try again. I'm going to leave this happy home and I'm going to ask if he can learn to love me again. It will be a huge risk but I know that if I'm thinking of loving someone else, then o shouldn't be with David. That's not fair to him or to me. I don't think he will be willing to give me a chance after all these years, but I know I will regret it if I don't try. The new year will hopefully be the start of the best years of my life. 

Sunday, December 6, 2015

I'll never understand

Why is hair such a big deal to men??? Seriously! It's fucking hair. It may make my appearance change but it doesn't change the person I am. People freaked out when I shaved the side of my head. Now I decided to color my hair purple. I've had so many compliments from woman it's actually crazy. But men, that's a whole different story. So I'm already not happy with my home life and now he doesn't like my hair. Honestly I don't give a fuck who likes it and who doesn't. But, to have to live with someone that pretty much doesn't even want to be seen with you because of your hair...fuck you. I'm so pissed over this stupid shit I might just rainbow color my hair.